DECEMBER 2002
Where do we go from here�?
 
Well no one really knows. The Nationwide Conference has decided to go ahead with restructuring their league despite the last amendment being turned down by the FA. The Conference have voted to amend their constitution to allow up to a further 44 clubs to become Associate Members of their league. They have sent out letters to all the clubs in the Northern, Southern and Isthmian League Premier Divisions inviting them to apply to join their league. If up to 22 clubs apply then there will be a Conference Division 2 formed. If up to 44 clubs apply then a Conference 2 North and Conference 2 South will be formed. These changes have yet to be ratified by the Leagues Committee, who meet at the end of January.

This opens up a whole load of questions:
First, if all clubs from all the leagues apply that would mean 22 clubs would be left out. On what criteria would clubs be chosen to be in the new divisions. Financial, support, facilities, or final league position? We should have no problem with financial as the sale of our ground site should clear any debts we may have. (Not certain on this obviously as I don't have access to Hinckley United's accounts, but am making a reasoned estimate.) Facilities could trip us up. We will have a Conference ground in a years time, but if the decision is made on our current facilities then it's back to the Senior League I'm afraid. Support at Hinckley is not great by Dr Martens standard, but we would be compared to all clubs at this level, and having done the maths we are in the top 44 clubs average attendance for all three leagues, just. Final league position would see us slip up unless a drastic leap is made. Guessing that the bottom 7 clubs in each league would be cut off then, believing as I do that we will avoid relegation, I doubt wether we could climb higher than 15th from our present position.

Second, 22 clubs will be effectively relegated a league through no fault of their own. Not being a lawyer (or employed by Leeds United FC) I do not know where this stands 'in statute'. Is it legal or not?

Third, the last date for resigning from the Dr Martens League is December 31st 2002. (As recently demonstrated by Sh*psh*d.) To be able to even apply for the Conference set-up Hinckley would have to resign from the Dr Marten League. Under the present constitution if you withdraw after this date then the club could receive a £5000 fine. Also, should the resignation be accepted then if the club wishes to withdraw the resignation before the end of the season, the club would be regarded as a new member applying for a place within the Dr Marten League. This would mean having to have all the Dr Marten regulations up to scratch and starting at the lower level of the league. I don't know about the other divisions, but I would think they have a similar constitution.

Whilst I think most clubs would apply to the Conference through fear of being left behind, it must not be a blind decision. Most of us know that sensibly a club can only survive on the basis of attracting enough people through the gates to pay the wage bill. Football Clubs will find their natural level eventually. Hinckley United must not jump into a decision that will give us 5 years of Conference football but ultimately destroy the club. When Hinckley were doing well in the Western we were getting gates of 450 average. If we could match that or increase to up to 600 I don't think we could sustain a Conference club. We should be wary of a situation that could leave us in the position of having to start all over again. A football club needs to grow at the same rate in all aspects of its set up, not just have a good team on the pitch. The new ground is the next step for Hinckley and consolation should be the aim in the league at the moment. I'm not so sure that applying for this new division would be the 'Holy Grail' it seems to be.
 
This was never going to be an easy month (and this was where we lost it last season.)
To start with an away trip to Worcester City who were top of the table at the time. This game turned out to be an exact opposite of the game at Middlefield Lane earlier in the year. Worcester took an early grip on the game and an early lead. After only 3 minutes Tommy Whittle saved well from Adam Webster but couldn't stop the rebound that had fallen to the same Worcester player. 1 - 0 and the game had just kicked off! To their credit the Hinckley team didn't crumble and equalised after 10 minutes. A Fox corner was met by an unstoppable Scott Voice header to make it 1 - 1. At this point it really was end to end stuff. On the half hour Worcester took the lead again. Jon Holloway headed a right side cross home, as Whittle had no chance. Hinckley equalised even sooner than before. From the re-start we got a corner and Fox sent it over for Captain 'stand in' Nick Preston to power home yet another header. 2 - 2 and only half an hour gone. For the second half Worcester took control. A couple of good saves by Whittle, a couple of wide chances and Worcester hit the woodwork three times. Hinckley held on to a well fought 2 - 2 draw, and a point away to the leaders.
Weymouth away was next. Usually the Terras are up there pushing the top 5 but their financial troubles this season have seen them in the bottom 5. This would be the proverbial '6 pointer'. Hinckley started well and had a couple of chances but Weymouth woke up after 35 minutes as a 30 yard, er, thunderbolt from Mark Robinson gave Weymouth the lead. Weymouth took over from then on. A couple more chances went begging before Weymouth increased their lead right on half time. A corner was flicked on over Tommy Whittle and Robinson, again, was on hand to net at the far post. 2 - 0 down at half time. Weymouth started as they had finished and had Hinckley on the rack for the start of the second half. Hinckley managed to weather to storm and got a goal back on the hour. The Weymouth defence completely ignored a Preston cross and Wayne Dyer 'snuck' in at the far post to score. It was Hinckley's turn to wake up and we equalised after 70 minutes as Scott Voice scored from yet another of his now trademark headers. 2 - 2 and in the final 20 minutes both sides could've won it, and then seemed scared to lose it, so it finished 2 - 2.
Could this year be our year in the League Cup? Er no. Apparently the match kicked off at the Walks but Hinckley didn't turn up. A Chris Bacon hatrick gave King's Lynn a 3 - 0 scoreline. We were out of the League Cup and that's all I'm prepared to go into. Yes still bitter.
Halesowen Town came to Middlefield Lane next, for the first time since the mid-eighties. With them they would bring former Sh*psh*d striker Kirk Masters. Christ was he up for it. Within the first 10 minutes we were only saved by the post when Masters cut inside and had a shot. Halesowen were doing all the early running and took the lead on 20 minutes. Jason Ashby got to the by line and cut the ball back for Stuart Skidmore to score from 15 yards. Halesowen had another good chance wasted when Lee Collins put a header just over the bar after 25 minutes. Hinckley didn't come into it until the last third of the half. A couple of good corners resulted in Adamson, in the Halesowen goal, saving from Penny, Smith and Voice. Hinckley equalised at the start of the second half. 5 minutes were gone when Hinckley had a free kick. Fox pushed the ball to Voice who's shot evaded Adamson and 'nestled' in the bottom corner. 10 minutes later Voice had another good chance but Adamson got down to save it. It became end to end with both sides not settling for a draw. Gavin Stone somehow shot over when left unmarked by Hinckley defenders at a corner and a Sadler cross across the face of goal was agonisingly too quick for the out stretched leg of Wayne Dyer. The game finished 1 - 1 and it became Hinckley's fourth straight league score draw.
Games against Tamworth have always been full of action so I suppose there would have to be a dull one soon. Tamworth having taken over the top spot in the table from Worcester were on a run of 11 games unbeaten. This was one game where we would have taken a draw. Unfortunately my pessimistic attitude seemed to be what the players where also thinking. Without being overwhelmed or out played, we never really looked threatening either. Tamworth took the lead after 25 minutes. Scott Rickards won a free kick on the edge of the area and Mark Cooper scored from the set piece giving Tommy Whittle no chance. Cue an hour of midfield battling and no real chances, with Hinckley looking to get something from set pieces. The game was won for Tamworth with 10 minutes left. Colley went down the right and passed square for Rickards to slot home from just inside the area. Final score 2 - 0.
The last game of 2002 would be against Dover Athletic. Dover had spent the last few seasons in the Conference and their recent money problems had caused their relegation. Having already beaten us at the Crabble and in a top 6 spot, Dover would be looking to complete the double in their bid to return to the Conference. As usual with Hinckley's Jekll and Hyde season they decided to play football and not roll over. Straight from the kick off Hinckley, looking more balanced playing a 4-4-2 formation, got the ball down the flanks and looked dangerous, even as early as the first attack when Scott Voice headed into the arms of Paul Hyde. We weren't in complete control but comparing to recent games it was like watching another team. It took a keeping error to give Hinckley the lead though. Paul Hyde in the Dover goal received a back pass on a sticky surface and as Chris Smith was rushing in, for some unknown reason, Hyde decided to dribble the ball away instead of hoofing it. Smith took the ball from Hyde and blasted it into the open goal. Hussah, we had actually taken the lead in a game this month! The goal lifted Hinckley even more and the Dover goal was peppered with chances, all missed. Hyde made up for his previous error by denying Smith twice and stopping another Voice header. Come half time we were all wondering just when it would go pear shaped. Hinckley unusually came out playing much the same as the first half. The game began to get more physical as it wore on, and Hinckley should've had a penalty. Chris Smith chased a 50/50 ball with Paul Hyde, who dropped on the ball as Smith put his foot in. The ball popped out, and as Smith got up to take it, Hyde did what can only be described as a rugby tackle. The linesman right infront of the offence signalled a penalty to the ref, who in his own little world decided to wave play on. So what's the point of having linos then? Typically Dover had equalised within 5 minutes. Jamie Day got the ball on the edge of the area, lost his marker and slotted home from 10 yards. We should have been 2 - 0 in the lead but instead it was 1 - 1. Even then Hinckley stuck at it Wayne Dyer missed a glorious chance as he failed to connect properly in the 6 yard box and Hyde tipped over a Scott Voice effort. In the dying seconds Neil Cartwright saw the glory. He received the ball on the half way line, took it inside to the edge of the area an unleashed a 'stormer' towards the top corner. Hyde managed to parry the shot and it just rolled out of play before Chris Smith could get to it. That was it and the game ended with yet another hauntingly familiar 1 - 1 scoreline.

Too many draws this month, I think, 6 games and no wins. At the end of the season will we look back and think if only 2 of those had been wins. On the good side the lads fought back well at both Worcester and Weymouth and showed that they can compete with the performance against Dover. Remember we have played 2 clubs this month who were top of the league at the time, so one defeat is not bad, but points are precious and we'd better start picking up some more.
 
World of Football Stuff
Middlesbrough fan Cory Taylor, 7 (Ah bless), found that his box of Middlesbrough Chocolates actually contained Southampton marshmallows. Nothing funny about that really except thinking about how his dad would explain Santa not knowing the difference. Perhaps Mr Claws is a rugby fan? Anyway it got me thinking to non-football merchandise that clubs could market, as to reflect their team, so here are a few:
  • Bolton - Pork Scratchings
  • Chelsea - Ladies Perfume
  • Arsenal - Fake dog sh*t (yes it's personal)
  • Man Utd - An A-Z of London with an all day Underground pass.
  • Boston - A 'get out of jail free' card
  • Liverpool - Car hubcaps with free screw driver
  • Darlington - A 'how to speak Colombian' cassette tape
  • Man City - Desert Eagle 9mm automatic
  • Fulham - A British National Passport
  • Millwall - A British National Party Passport
  • Rushden & D - A pair of 'Made in Taiwan' work boots
  • West Ham - A Christmas Turkey
  • Leicester - a national Lottery ticket
  • Tottenham - A Silver Scalpel (chutzpah! Ouch!!)
  • Leeds - A Baseball Bat, with the name of a good Lawyer
  • Aston Villa - A Turnip
  • Wolverhampton - A bridesmaid's dress
  • Exeter - A tray of silver spoons with free dust mask
  • Hartlepool - A ticket for the Gorilla house at Twycross Zoo

  • If you can think of something better, and let's face it that shouldn't be really hard, then put it on the message board.
     
    Coming next Season: No let up as Grantham and Chippenham come to the Lane, and we travel away to Stafford, all sides doing very well so far. We defend our Rolleston and Leicestershire Cup titles against Thurnby and Barwell. In a return of our third match of the season Hinckley will be looking to keep all eleven players on the pitch versus Hastings, well at least stay in double figures anyway. New Year resolutions? Hopefully a bl**dy win somewhere!
     
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